Finding Grace Page 4

  What! He was not going to let this kid bait him. Or give him any sign that he might care, even a little. He said, coolly as he could, “Everyone except Paul’s wife calls me Dagger.”

  “Dagger?” Thorne actually grinned at him. “No, I don’t think so. You look more like a sweet Georgia peach to me, but I’ll call you Jack if you’re nice.” Thorne had lowered his rough voice and was giving Dagger a coy smile.

  Dagger shot Thorne a glance known to wither jungles before moving on to Paul, who was actually laughing, the bastard. Somehow, Thorne had picked up on the Georgia accent he thought he’d left behind, and he was flirting with him, for chrissake.

  Irritating as all of that was, and laced with the damn guilt too, he wasn’t sure that’s what bothered him about Thorne. And Thorne definitely bothered him.

  Chapter Four

  Sleep on it. Yeah, right. Who the hell was I kidding?

  Thorne was running a lot slower than she usually did, on account of the pain in her left side.

  Fucker Griggs.

  Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough to distract her from her thoughts.

  Like I was gonna get any sleep with the ghosts of those hellhounds and their stinking breath down my neck. Gods, and I thought the nightmares were bad. I didn’t even have to close my eyes in that cage to bring the shit back. Fucker Jack, he’s the one that got me into this. Why did I trust him? God, I wish he wasn’t so…didn’t make me feel all…And then it’s like some crazy woman takes over my mouth and incredibly stupid shit falls out of it. Now what the hell am I gonna do? Buy a fucking lunch bucket? Maybe some lipstick?

  She laughed. Out loud. The pain stabbed at her side.

  This is so twisted.

  The peaceful little life she’d made for herself was just plain gone and she was going to have to accept that. People knew where she was now. There was no going back, was there? Couldn’t she just rabbit it the hell out of Seattle, find a new hole? Where the fuck were her visions when she needed them? But even as she asked the question, she knew the answer.

  She wasn’t even really surprised when she stopped running, bent over with her hands on her knees, and realized that the address at the bottom of the door she was looking at was Blackridge’s. She swore anyway.

  Thorne pressed the bell without giving herself a chance to change her mind. She waited, suddenly thankful for the tinted glasses she no longer needed in order to see. They hid the dark circles she knew, even without a mirror, were under her eyes. God, she hated mirrors.

  A buzzer sounded and Thorne pushed past the heavy door. She stared for a minute at the flight of stairs leading to the second-floor offices fate had drawn her to.

  One step at a time, she climbed. Just like knitting. One stitch at a time, one row at a time. She could get her life back.

  * * * *

  Paul’s smile was genuine. “Thorne! I’m glad you decided—”

  “I haven’t. Yet. I just thought I could look around, get a feel for the place, see if maybe…”

  “Sure. Come on in. Sorry, Dagger, would you mind leaving us?” The look of apology he gave Dagger was just as genuine. He really detested keeping him in the dark. They always interviewed prospective hires together.

  His partner gave him a piercing look, but nodded and left the room.

  Thorne turned and scanned Dagger’s ass when he passed her. “Mmm-mm, and what a pleasure it is to watch him leaving.”

  Paul thought she looked shocked by what she’d said. He sure as hell was. Dagger muttered something and closed the door behind him.

  “So, what can I do or say to influence your decision?” No point in beating around the bush. She was far too perceptive. He’d discovered that much yesterday—and not from what he’d read about her.

  Thorne tilted her head. “That’s a good start, Mr. Weston. No bullshit.”

  “Paul’s fine, except in front of clients. Should I call you Dr. Thorne?”

  Her smile was grim. “Just Thorne, please. For all practical purposes, Dr. Thorne died five years ago. What’s important to me is that you tell no one what I know Captain America told you about me. I need your word, Paul.”

  “I understand why you wouldn’t want…” He swallowed through a throat gone dry—“what happened…to be public knowledge, but I really can’t keep Dagger out of the loop forever. He is a full partner, you know. Say, how did you know?”

  She sighed. “You know how I knew about your arrangement with Jack—the same way I knew trouble was coming to the ball and what advice to give the lovelorn Captain America.”

  He wasn’t going to lie to her. “Is believing you actually have visions another deal breaker, Thorne?”

  “How else can you explain how I knew what I knew?” She was still standing, her hands on her hips.

  “Just because things aren’t common knowledge doesn’t mean the information isn’t out there. Somehow, you found out.” He paused, wanting to get back to business and more comfortable topics. “You certainly have the skills. I want to make this work, Thorne. But some things you’re just going to have to give me.”

  Thorne shrugged back. “Fine, keep your doubts. They’re not my problem.”

  Shit, she was making this hard on him. It had been bad enough yesterday in her apartment, knowing she was a woman, what she’d survived and what she’d been through in jail the day before. Seeing her standing here this morning, so small in her too-thin, shabby jacket and old, baggy clothes, talking tough with that broken voice, was shredding his heart.

  “Why don’t you sit down?” He got up and pulled a chair out for her. “You still haven’t explained why I can’t let Dagger in on the basics. Or at least that you’re a woman.” Just give me one goddamn break here. “He could run interference for you with the rest of team,” he offered hopefully.

  “He stays out of the loop, Paul, because…” She paused and chewed on her lip. “I don’t ever want him to look at me the way you look at me. And if he knew I was a woman, he might…” She toed the dent in the carpet from when he’d moved his desk away from the window. “No, damn it, I can’t. I just can’t. Besides, I don’t need anyone to run interference for me.” She straightened and looked back up at him. “I can take care of myself.”

  She was a woman all right, because she wasn’t making a damn bit of sense. She obviously liked Dagger, so why would she want him to assume she was a gay man? Paul’s right eye twitched. He figured it was a muscle spasm due to a night of bad dreams prompted by Thorne’s file.

  “If that’s the way it has to be, Thorne. Judging by the shiner you gave that cop, you’re not defenseless, anyway. You do understand that your, uh, appearance and manner are going to attract some, uh, colorful remarks from these men, right? They’re not used to working with anyone like you any more than you’re used to working with anyone like them. But if there’s any real harassment, I want to know about it right away. It’s imperative to me that you feel safe here. Is that understood?”

  “Yes, Paul. Thank you. Assuming I do end up working here.”

  “Yeah, well, I’ve got a couple of questions and stipulations myself.” He shifted in his chair. “I’m not sure how to ask you this, but about those three—”

  “Animals. I thought you might ask. And I’m going to answer because I want you to know that I trust you, Paul.” Her eyes focused on a lone paperclip. “Look, if I did send them to hell where they belong—and I’m not saying I did—it wasn’t for revenge. You have to understand, Paul, how much they enjoyed what they did to me. They enjoyed it so much that they could never have not done it again as soon as they were out, which would have been in under seven years with good behavior. If another woman fell into their hands and it had been within my power to stop them…Well, my life and all my ‘skills,’ as you call them, wouldn’t mean shit. Just sayin’, is all.”

  It was as close to a confession as anyone would ever get, Paul was sure. He lowered his voice. “I understand killing from a sense of duty, as a necessity.”

  Thorne
raised her head. “Yeah, I know. I can smell death on you, you know. See the shadows. They’re not as many or as strong as Jack’s, but they’re there.”

  Again with the vision shit. But it didn’t really matter how she knew about his and Dagger’s pasts. She did.

  Back to business. She was slippery, he’d give her that. And that reminded him. “Another thing. I want to make it clear that there’ll be no going off the reservation while you work for me. Is that understood, Thorne?”

  “I’m not sure. Does that mean you want me to ask you before I do anything that might be considered outside the lines? Say, accessing files in certain databases. Or would you prefer plausible deniability?”

  Paul pursed his lips in thought before saying, “The latter, thank you. It’s important that Blackridge’s reputation remain squeaky clean. So if you should find it necessary to do some accessing—” he cleared his throat “—outside the lines, don’t get caught.”

  “I take it, then, that you vet your clients?”

  “Of course.”

  “I’m sure that I can be more thorough. If you give me a client list, it will give me a better idea of what I can do for you, too. Here’s what I would need so far—if we can work things out.” Thorne pulled a crumpled piece of paper from her pocket and handed him a neatly-written list with detailed costs.

  Paul looked at her and grinned. Thorne grinned back. “Couldn’t help it. Once I started thinking about it, it just sort of…I want to make this work, too, Paul. So, uh, what would your employment terms be? I don’t suppose there’s any way you could pay me in cash?”

  “Sorry, I need everything on the up and up. Ten-ninety-nines and all.”

  “Damn, I figured you would.” Thorne let out a resigned sigh. “That means I’ll be back on the grid. Oh, and I’m guessing that your men are independent contractors rather than employees?”

  “That’s right.”

  “Well, I need to be an official employee. You’ll want to patent some of my work. If I’m a contractor, you’d own the applications and devices, but ownership of the code and the patents would be much hazier. It’s important to me that Blackridge’s name is on those papers when you file them, not mine. I want to stay off that part of grid.”

  “But why? I’m guessing there’s some money to be made there.”

  “Yeah.” She shrugged. “What I care about is staying under the radar of certain people. I’ve experienced some very heavy-handed recruitment efforts in the past and I don’t ever want to deal with that again.”

  Paul recalled the file he’d read from the DOD. “Yes. Major Darmfelder. He’s gone on record with some pretty serious accusations against you. You’ve already addressed one to my satisfaction, but I’d like to give you an opportunity to defend yourself on another. Did you really sell military designs to a foreign government?” He tried to keep his tone even.

  “So that’s how Major Shitfield tells it. Why am I not surprised, with the way he likes to twist reality until it looks his way?” She sighed. “I was sixteen, Paul, when I sold those first two patents. I checked the company out. They were even certified military contractors, for fuck’s sake. How was I to know they’d be bought out by a foreign interest a year later? Hey, at least it wasn’t China. And all of the patents I sold after those remained with U.S. companies. I haven’t sold any since—”

  “So what’s your problem with the government, Thorne? Why did you turn the major down?”

  “I turned him down because I’ve always hated bullies. But, more importantly, if you ask me to do something I’m not comfortable with, I can tell you to fuck off and walk out the door. That’s not exactly true with government work, is it?”

  “I see your point.” And he did, maybe too well. He’d never known those he’d killed. That’s how it was for a sniper. Not like it had been for Dagger. He’d always counted himself lucky for that. He’d never questioned his CO until the woman. That had been an assassination. He’d felt the truth of it even before he pulled the trigger. He’d checked into her, discreetly, after. He didn’t like what he found. Politics. His “cruise” was over a month later and he hadn’t re-upped.

  Still, he was proud to have served his country. Thorne was probably a damn liberal. She was a woman and an academic, after all.

  “Uh, Thorne, you do understand that everyone around here besides yourself has been in one branch of the military or other at some point, right? Is that going to be a problem for you?”

  “Not as long as they don’t go all rigid, tight-ass GI Joe and bossy on me.”

  Paul really hoped they wouldn’t. “Well, I’m satisfied. Do I get to talk to Dagger before making you an offer?”

  Thorne laughed. “Pay me whatever you think I’m worth. That’s not why I want the work. Shit, now I’ll have to open a bank account here.”

  “Here?”

  “Yeah, I moved it all to Switzerland after…Organized, efficient, great chocolate and they still understand the meaning of the word privacy. Don’t look at me like that. I only expect the latter of you, like we talked about—not that good chocolate would hurt.” She offered him a crooked smile. “So, uh, when do I start?”

  A Swiss bank account? Just how many patents had she sold, anyway? Well, that explained the nice laptop and why she didn’t care about the money, if not why she lived like she did. Oh hell, he was in so far over his head, it really didn’t make any difference any more. Besides, she’d just said yes.

  “Today, if you like. I have an empty office just waiting for you to fill it with…” Paul looked over the list she’d handed him. “Wait, what’re the oscilloscope and soldering iron for?”

  “After I interview the users, your crew, I’d like to customize some of your electronics. Do you have a desktop tied into your network I could use in the meantime? I didn’t bring my laptop. It’ll take a while to set up some IP routes that I’m comfortable won’t be easily traceable. I’ll be able to work out something more elaborate once I have a custom setup.”

  Ah, the peculiar hum of geek talk. “Um, sure.”

  As they walked, Paul noticed Thorne was moving a little stiffly. He remembered how her chair had crashed to the floor in the interrogation room and her bloody wrists. She was wearing some kind of half-mittens that covered them today, effectively hiding the damage he knew was there—both old and new.

  It went against his nature to pretend she wasn’t hurt, didn’t need care and protection. Too late for that now. Five years too late. All he could offer her was a bridge back to the world. And that meant keeping Dagger in the dark. God damn it, he was screwed.

  “Great space, Paul. I won’t need the desk, but I’m going to need three—” her eyes scanned the room and narrowed “—no, make it four long tables. Most of that equipment should be overnight-able, if you’re willing. If you let me order it, I can probably negotiate some good pricing.”

  Oh yeah, he’d definitely let her do the negotiating.

  “After that, I’d like to do some shopping.” Thorne was bouncing on her sneakers, obviously excited.

  He smiled. Yes, definitely a woman.

  A large shadow filled the doorway and Dagger stuck his head in. “Good, you could use a decent jacket. Wouldn’t want you to freeze your punk ass.”

  Paul agreed, but he wouldn’t have put it quite that way.

  “What? Oh, yeah…I guess. Anyway, it’s possible I’ll be set up enough to start on that client list this afternoon.”

  Paul saw Dagger’s frown and groaned to himself. He trusted Thorne. Hell, even if he didn’t, he wasn’t dumb enough to think he could have stopped her from accessing anything she wanted to access anyway. But he couldn’t easily explain that to Dagger. Yup, screwed.

  * * * *

  Dagger watched Thorne carry yet another box of high-end stereo equipment into the empty office at the end of the hall. “That’s nicer shit than I have in my living room, Thorne. You don’t even have a stereo in your apartment. What do you need a setup like that in your office for? This e
quipment must have cost your first two months’ salary—you know, the one you haven’t earned yet. And you’re still wearing that piece of shit jacket that wasn’t warm when it was new, like twenty years ago. Are you nuts?”

  “Well, Mommy Dearest, not that it’s any of your business, but just because you’re so charming and irresistible, I’ll tell you. The wall I share with my neighbor is so thin that I can hear him take a leak if there’s not a lot of traffic, so I pretty much have to wear headphones. This place has great walls, headphones bug me, and music helps me focus, like knitting. As for the jacket, you all are a bunch of pussy freeze-babies around here. You’d think Seattle had a real winter or something. It’s fucking balmy compared to where I grew up. Not like you, my tender Georgia peach.”

  Dagger noticed that Thorne had ignored the financial reference altogether. No wonder the kid was so broke, with the way he spent his money. He shouldn’t care and didn’t know why he did. Damn smartass. He was grateful no one else had heard the conversation.

  Except—shit, they had.

  He recognized Farley’s and Mills’s snickers. He wished those dickheads were still on detail. “Who’s your new girlfriend, Dagger?” They followed it with a gleeful chorus of, “Or is it boyfriend?”

  He gave them a look deadly enough to silence a firing range.

  But Farley was eyeing Thorne and missed it. “Yeah, inquiring minds want to know. AC? DC? Both?”

  Thorne continued unpacking a really nice subwoofer. “What fucking difference does it make? Look, if I’m a girl, I gotta be a dyke, right? And if I’m a boy, I’m a fag. So unless one of you is hiding his shit in a closet, what difference does it fucking make? I thought you people had that whole ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ bullshit down.”

  Paul stuck his head in. “Any problem here?”

  “No sir. We were just welcoming the new guy, gal, whatever,” Farley piped. More snickers.

  “Thorne?”

  Dagger heard the protective tone in Paul’s voice, even if Farley and Mills didn’t. Now why would—